turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
be right there i have to get my cape
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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