I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Randomize