Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
