This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Randomize
