There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
He is an equal opportunity slut.
It was confusing and full of hummus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
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