I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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