Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
