we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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