what day is it and did you see me today?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
This is the high leading the old right now
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
