he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
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