Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
