P.S. I can't hear my feet
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
