It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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