if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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