I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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