she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
My boob is missing a layer of skin
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Randomize
