it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
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