So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
don't judge my taste in strippers
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Randomize
