Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
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