you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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