is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
why is half of my head shaved?
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
