How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
