At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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