So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
