Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
