My brain says no but my pants say off.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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