So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
