my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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