Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
