She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.