Don't make out with my wife yet
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize