Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
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