if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
whose parrot is this?
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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