If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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