We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Im part way to drunk.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
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