first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
