I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
My vagina just clenched in fear
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