I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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