Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
