It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
