the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
where am i from again
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize