I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
