Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
No stitches, just platelets and will power
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
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