I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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