dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
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