Betty ford says i'm here all night
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
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