I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Randomize
