All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
