C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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