Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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