He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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