Texts From Last Night

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  (516): View more from New York

  whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?

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  (516): whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"? http://tfl.nu/wiv5
  Replies (63) Good night (5443) Bad night (578)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive

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  (781): Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive http://tfl.nu/cgnf
  Replies (13) Good night (2375) Bad night (3869)
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  (337): View more from Louisiana

  Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.

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  (337): Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop. http://tfl.nu/jwrv
  Replies (18) Good night (4812) Bad night (1115)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression

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  (703): the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression http://tfl.nu/ti0p
  Replies (30) Good night (1360) Bad night (3908)
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  (510): View more from California

  just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?

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  (510): just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i? http://tfl.nu/gdnc
  Replies (7) Good night (3762) Bad night (1068)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....

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  (480): i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera.... http://tfl.nu/on9i
  Replies (25) Good night (2783) Bad night (4747)
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  (302): View more from Delaware

  Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now

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  (302): Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now http://tfl.nu/i71d
  Replies (15) Good night (868) Bad night (4581)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.

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  (917): I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips. http://tfl.nu/10y5
  Replies (14) Good night (3350) Bad night (1980)
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  (650): View more from California

  Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human

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  (650): Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human http://tfl.nu/6fr0
  Replies (4) Good night (2828) Bad night (1439)
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  (713): View more from Texas

  He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.

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  (713): He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that. http://tfl.nu/cec8
  Replies (6) Good night (802) Bad night (1583)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?

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  (678): Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail? http://tfl.nu/41r0
  Replies (9) Good night (1046) Bad night (579)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.

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  (775): She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again. http://tfl.nu/g27v
  Replies (3) Good night (690) Bad night (485)
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?

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  (774): Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl? http://tfl.nu/9fti
  Replies (3) Good night (435) Bad night (289)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face

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  (303): I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face http://tfl.nu/o8jb
  Replies (0) Good night (540) Bad night (265)
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me

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  (508): returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me http://tfl.nu/6648
  Replies (1) Good night (349) Bad night (153)

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