Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Proof That Kendall Jenner Is The Queen of Cannes
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.